Oct 06

A heart for children

by in Peppa

For those of you who have questioned and wondered if I had disappeared or given up on my list, I assure you I have not. This last week was kid’s camp here at Totara and thus all my time and energy was poured into the happenings here.  Now that our first holiday camp has ended I am able to take a breath and get back on track with this dare.

Some times as I travel through the days at camp I am overwhelmed, not by the chaos that kids bring but rather by the grace of God that I am involved in this life. I am often humbled that I have the amazing privilege of showing kids the love that God has for them. My heart bursts because for some this might be the first glimpse of love they have ever experienced. Knowing where I came from and the life that I have lived I can’t help but wonder why. Why would God use someone like me? I have made so many mistakes in my life and have often gone down the wrong roads. I am stunned that God would allow me the opportunity to serve Him in such a way. The funny thing is that I used to not like kids or rather I was terrified of ruining a kid’s life. So the fact that I have ended up at a camp filled with kids day after day is insane.

You see I was afraid of kids for the very simple reason that I was afraid I would somehow mess them up. I was terrified that I would be the one who could not love them enough and thus be the person who irreversible screwed them up. I was afraid of making a mistake and to be quite honest I was worried about the responsibility that comes with kids. They watch you and mimic your life as they try to sort out what is right and wrong and I knew how messed up I was, I didn’t want some kid to end up like me.  Yet somehow kids were drawn to me and slowly God softened my heart to what He was doing. I know that I don’t always get things right, and sometimes I get annoyed with the young campers that come through our gates. At the same time God has given me a heart for these kids and He is constantly working on my heart to show me how to love and serve them better. To be honest I love that I have the chance to see their lives changed. Not many people can say that they have the opportunity to touch so many kids’ lives. If all I do is help one child see the love of God than my life will have been worth it. This is why I get so wrapped up in kids camps and why I disappear from the world for a short time.

Here is my list for this post:
61. The opportunity to be a part of this amazing work here at camp
62. Seeing kids want and get Bibles
63. Watching as campers sing worship songs and memory verses
64. Having my brother here as a leader
65. Top town and all the crazy fun it was
66. The LIT team and just the servant hearts the crew had
67. Being able to stand beneath the beautiful stars at night
68. Smiles on kid’s faces throughout the week
69. Being exhausted at the end of the week, knowing I gave all I had
70. Getting a camper to go down the flying fox who was petrified
71. Connecting with the LIT’s
72. Coffee with Angus, Natasha, Anna and Courtney in the early mornings?
73. A comfy couch to sit on to relax in
74. A slow Saturday to rejuvenate
75. The lives of campers who were changed
76. The beautiful cherry blossom trees that are littering the road with pink
77. The cool breeze on my face
78. Quiet wisdom spoken to my heart
79. Cats to snuggle with
80. Blue sky for a beautiful spring day!

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